Self-Imposed Barrier!

Today is my swimming day, and I realized I cannot swim. Well, actually, I can swim, according to my swimming teacher from the US, but I’m still not used to that idea, so I planned not to swim.

Let's dive a little into a socially uncomfortable topic. I thought I was about to graduate into menopause since I haven't had my period for the past 11 months. But this month, I found out I was wrong. Instead of being annoyed, I found myself overjoyed, even though the heavier flow with blood clots made me feel tired.

Throughout my life, I believed I couldn’t swim during my period. I missed some lessons in my first swimming class for that reason. I think I was around 12 or 13 at that time. Then, during my second swimming class, in the pool at my school in the US, I didn’t go in the water either. I just sat on the poolside in my ordinary clothes, watching the lessons from afar, and my teacher asked me why. I told her, and she didn’t seem to understand. Later, she realized what I meant and said, “Yes, you can swim during your period. We use tampons.”

I had never used tampons before and chose not to try them then. To this day, I still don’t use tampons, but I’m thinking maybe I should try now. This is partly unfamiliarity and partly something already embedded in my belief system that’s holding me back.

I’m asking myself, “Do you want to break free from the restrictions you impose on yourself, or do you want to stay like this for the rest of your life?” Well, maybe not the rest of my life, since I’ll be in real menopause sooner or later. But from my experience, changes in one area of life can also affect other areas.

It’s just a woman’s struggle and might seem insignificant, or something to laugh at or ignore for others, but it matters to me because it’s my life. This is a real dilemma for me, and that’s why I decided to write it down and reflect on it.

Yes, today, I may swim for the first time in my life during my period.

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