A Tiny Sense of Liberation!

Knowing that the symptoms I’ve been experiencing for quite a while are due to the side effects of a medication I was taking, rather than aging, is profoundly shifting my mood. I was worried that I wouldn’t have the energy to do the things I still want to accomplish in life. Now, with the symptoms markedly subsiding, I realize how much I had endured over the past few years.

Sometimes, we accept situations because we believe there are no other options. I was a bit worried but decided to stop taking that medication entirely. The level of risk is actually low since I am also taking another similar medication alongside it. Yesterday, I had a bit of heartburn and realized I had experienced that intense symptom frequently, but I didn't know it was a side effect of the medication, and I managed to bear it. Now, I don’t want to experience it again.

I am reflecting on similar situations I’ve faced throughout my life. I tolerated problems and situations for as long as I could, and then one day, I decided enough was enough and gathered the courage to make changes. It wasn’t easy, but today I am glad I made those changes. They are similar to removing side effects; I felt lighter and happier.

I forgot the exact day I made a significant change in my life, but when I checked an old document, I found that it was a little over 17 years ago. Another significant change was more recent, but I don't have any documents to refer to—perhaps 4 or 5 years ago, or a bit longer; I don’t remember precisely. It was akin to the quote I have on my WordPress blog, “Why do you stay in prison when the door is so wide open?” by Rumi. Sometimes, we are afraid to leave the prison because we fear the unfamiliar and the unknown.

With all the changes I’ve made, I’ve regained hope in my life. I don’t want to live a hundred years without hope; I’d rather live a few minutes or hours with hope. I may forget the side effects of the medication I suffered from in a few months. Now, I’ve forgotten the actual pains I went through in my life. I am trying to recall them only to appreciate my current situation and life.

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