The Choice!

This morning, I found myself thinking about why people stay in unhealthy, unhappy relationships. Courage to leave may be one factor, but I'm realizing there’s more to it than that. Financial dependency is not the only reason; emotional dependency can be even more significant, more complex than we often recognize. Obligation, responsibility, and so many other factors are intertwined.

I reflected on my own experience, and yes, it took a lot of courage to leave a relationship. I was unhappy for a very long time, yet I lacked the courage to leave and held onto a certain hope that things would change. Then, there was a gentle push from someone I admired.

"Just get a divorce; you can live with that. My sisters are the same—they can live with that," he said casually while we were on a job-related trip. I think he was sitting in the front seat of the car, and I was in the back when he said that. That was all I needed, and within a week after that trip, everything was done. Even he was amazed. He didn’t think it would happen so quickly.

I was still thinking my life was over, but later, I discovered that two male friends from the field actually envied me. They said, "When will we be like that?" One is now divorced, but I lost contact with the other, so I don’t know his situation. Another unexpected person who envied me was someone very close to me. I don’t want to reveal who she is, but I could feel the pain inside her at that time. She couldn’t have what I had—the choice.

I grew up with the idea of "happily ever after" from books, and I didn’t feel good about myself for many years. Accepting that status was very hard for me, but I tried to be honest with everyone and revealed my status openly, even though it hurt me sometimes. I just didn’t want to hide.

At this age, it doesn’t matter anymore. I am happy with that decision, and I enjoy my freedom. Not a single regret.

These are the thoughts that came to me this morning.

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